Following the wandering stars

Hm, the song is pretty gloomy. I feel better than this sounds. Yet it's winter, and I am facing so many changes, so many first times.

I'm learning how dependent you get when you're living "as a couple". Suddenly you gotta learn or re-learn everything, everything. Even thinking for yourself, by yourself. So weird. Long and sometimes painful process. I follow the wandering stars that bring me light, here and there.

Tattooing

Hm, while I'm wondering about love and hate, life and death, cigarettes or cigarillos... will I finish this piece in time for next week?

It comes directly from what I am living, I gotta finish it quickly, to start another one. Suddenly everything's boiling in me... when I thought inspiration would fail me, chaos brings new perspectives.

Chaos... a friend of mine noticed i did not finished my sentences lately.. I start with something, jump to another topic, and another.

And truly, I realize that's me, at the moment. Chaos. Soon I hope a happy chaos again.

Wondering

Right now, through the chaos, I'm focusing on work. Next week that wonderful, expected varnishing. Then, gotta start looking for (flexible) jobS, that allow me to keep taking care of my babes. For the varnishing, I feel overwhelmed, dunno where to find the strength, probably in the people around that support me so much.

Yeah, I'm wondering, will I find peace again, will I succeed, will I be the best mom for my babies.

Moving sands. I'm not used to them yet.

But maybe the worst was to walk on secure lands.
 Then you forget how to get your balance, maybe.